“I hope I have the love that you two share, when I get married.”
This statement came from almost everyone of our children. I have to hand it to them, this is the kind of love we want them to have; the love that comes from two people walking, learning, and growing on this “straight and narrow” path together.
I am not saying that it has been an easy path. We were both “into” our own personal path and we had some hard lessons we learned. We don’t really want our children repeating our mistakes.
We had both been married before and had children in those marriages. We began our marriage with five children and then the Father blessed us with a child of our own. They do, first and foremost, all belong to the Father. There was nine years difference in our oldest and our youngest. We had four sons and two daughters.
With other people involved, you do not get to make the rules and enforce them as they need to be. Our children, for the most part, took the path of the world as we had done. It still saddens our hearts today. We have talked to our youngest daughter and we all agree that there will be no dating for her.
I compare dating to shoe-shopping for women. We all like shoes to fit perfect and we try on several pair until we find the perfect one, we think. In a few weeks, we are ready for another pair because that one, the perfect one, doesn’t suit us anymore.
My husband compares dating to car-hunting for guys. The car has to be shiny, fast, and make them look good. Their friends have to like the car and they get to test drive it.
We, neither one of us, want this path for our children, but we have only one child left at home and she just turned sixteen.
The Father gave us a different way of looking at who our children are to be. Since we are talking about daughters, I want to share how a bride can look at things, to keep her heart pure for that blessed day.
You see, we have not always been Feast Keepers. It wasn’t until the time our Father laid out this plan, that we began keeping them all. Now, we wouldn’t know what to do without them. They are so joyous.
In the Scriptures, we have appointed times and those times prepare us for our Savior’s return … OH HAPPY DAY!!! They can also show how we are to be preparing as a bride for her wedding day.
We believe that ladies do not go looking for a husband, but that the husband finds his bride. You see, we love to read about the marriages in the Scriptures and I don’t recall but one or two women that pursued the man.
The Feast Days given in Scripture, show us a path to marriage. The first one we come to is Passover. This is the time we, as women, are betrothed; or if you will, the bride is purchased.
Even though they are still part of the same feast as Passover, we have the Days of Unleavened Bread. This is the purging, cleansing time that the bride is making herself ready for her groom. It is a preparation time.
Next we have Shavuot/Pentecost. This is the day the bride receives her wedding garment or dress.
The next is Trumpets. This is the invitations going out announcing the big day.
Then we have Atonement – At One Ment – or the wedding day.
We also have the Feast of Tabernacles which is the honeymoon and the Last Great Day; this is when the children come.
After being shown this layout of marriage, we prayed and asked the Father to show us how to go from here with our daughter. We are not saying we have all it all figured out, but we do know that we do not want her “looking” for a man to marry. We want her preparing for him and learning how to be an acceptable help meet for him.
We had read an article once before, that suggested when a young lady is looking at other men; they may be looking at someone else’s husband. How true we believe that to be. The Father knows who He has picked for you and please, trust Him. There is no better matchmaker than the One who created us in the first place. This life we are given is hard enough when we are walking for and living for our Creator (from a worldly standpoint); we do not need the extra pressure of “finding the right man.”
I just have one problem, what am I going to do when my last child gets married and leaves home? I guess we’ll let the Father take care of that too!
I know that this is about young women dating or betrothal but I have to say … The love worth waiting for, is our Savior to come and we will live happily ever after. OH HAPPY DAY!!!
As for my husband and myself, we recently celebrated our seventeenth wedding anniversary. We both agree the Father has brought us a long way and we still have a way to go, but our love is stronger now than ever before. We are blessed that the Father brought us together and has opened our eyes as a family to what His will is for our daily lives.
Many times He tells us to wait. Waiting isn’t easy, but it has always turned out to be a blessing. “They that wait upon Yahweh shall renew their strength, they shall mount upon wings like eagles, they shall run and not grow weary, they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31
“ … teach me Yahweh, teach me Yahweh to wait.” In His Love,