Have you ever thought of waiting as a gift from the Lord? He has shown me by His grace that it is most certainly a gift and a privilege. I have not always known that, but I’m so glad He has opened my eyes! It does not have to be a “trial” or a “struggle,” but if we are willing, it can be one of the sweetest times of our lives with our Savior. Are you waiting for something in your life right now? I am. I am waiting on God for a somewhat unusual gift- a husband! But not just any “husband.” I could have probably obtained that years ago by giving in to all the “match making” my friends and family have tried to do or better yet, pick someone out for myself. But, I don’t trust my own judgment in these really vital areas of life. I figure it would be terribly easy for me to make a bad choice on something so important and lasting. One day, when I was around 18 years old, and had just left the halls of high school for good, I decided that I needed to give God control over *every* area of my life and I asked Him to choose a mate for me – the one He had actually designed me for before the foundations of the world! The man whose “rib” I carry deep within. The one that I could never be capable of finding all by myself, apart from God’s sovereign wisdom.

Marriage is such an amazing thing- a holy thing, something that perfectly demonstrates Christ’s love for us, His bride. So, when it comes time for me to walk down the isle, I want to make sure that the man I’m gazing lovingly at is the one God chose for me! For this reason, I have made the choice to not date. God has been so good to me and protected me even in the midst of *not* being home-schooled. It is with gratitude to God and a humble heart that I say I have made the choice to not date, but wait on God for His choice for a husband. A radical decision, many tell me, but one that God has led me to nevertheless. As Eric and Leslie Ludy put it so beautifully, “I have given God the ‘pen’ and the freedom to write my love story, taking my error-full hands off.”

However, we must remember that with this beautiful idea also comes learning how to be truly patient and that is usually the most difficult part- because it’s hard to believe in what we cannot see. Through the years, the Lord has taught me several things about waiting and contentment and my once hasty heart has finally learned to “sleep” in God ‘s will until He wakes my “Adam” up. If He, in His sovereignty, chooses to never give me a husband, then in true God-given contentment, I can say, “That’s okay because Jesus is more than enough, and my life is full and overflowing because of Him. I need nothing more to complete me.”

Do you think God will drop a man from the sky?!”

You may be surprised how many people have asked me this question. Or maybe, people have said similar things to you. But, what often bothers me is the amazing pressure of family and acquaintances to “fix you up” with a man for a date, even when they know where you stand on the issue. Oh, they say it’s “nothing serious, just dinner and conversation.” Even the church is saturated with this “harmless- fun -getting-to-know- a- possible- suitor” game. It’s bad enough that large families are approached with questions, along with criticism and looks of condemnation. But well-meaning people, (especially the Church) are discouraging young single women in their faith and obedience to the Lord as well. How disheartening!

My extended family and friends of the family have plotted many “set-ups” on my behalf over the years. From “The nice Christian boy at church” to the “Prominent young man who owns much land and has a booming business,” they’ve pressured, harassed, and even violated my identity by giving out my picture and phone number to strangers! And in the midst of all their work, I have sometimes vaguely wondered if I could have missed God. But, do you know what? God is so amazing that He has confirmed every single time that it truly was not Him at all. He has even allowed me to see some of these “prospects” a year or so later and the life they are leading. Wow. All I can say is, “Thank you, Lord!!” Oh, how He protects and preserves us without us even being aware of it!

I want to share dinner with my husband and be able to truthfully say to him, “Darling, you’re the first man I’ve shared an intimate meal with.” I want to talk with him on the phone when we aren’t physically together and sincerely say, “Honey, I enjoy every minute of our phone conversations together. They’re even more special, because I never wasted hours of vain blabbering on boys or men I was ‘dating’ at the moment.” I want to cook his favorite meal and serve it to him under candle light and be satisfied in my heart that I’ve never done such for another. I want to leave love letters and flirtatious little post-it notes in his lunch box or in his vehicle or on his pillow, and know that I’ve never wasted the ink, paper, or my heart in that way on another man. I want to “date” my husband, even if it’s a picnic in the back yard and have the assurance that he’s a keeper and I don’t have to worry about a “break-up”. Will it be worth all my denials of the Mr. Church Go-ers, Mr. Land Owners, Mr. Widowers, and Mr. Calls to No Avail? You’d better believe it!

I must add something else. Romans 4 tells us about Abraham- how he believed God, despite his old age and the “deadness of Sarah’s womb.” He still believed God for a son. It says he “hoped against hope.” Being not weak in faith, he considered not the circumstance or how things looked in the natural. He was “fully persuaded” that God was able to perform this miracle. And it was imputed to him for righteousness. Romans 4:3 repeats, “Abraham believed God and it was counted unto him for righteousness.”

I love this! It was not his giving into what everyone else was saying, or doing what his logic told him to do (just look at how the whole Ishmael situation turned out) that was accounted to him as righteousness. It was his faith in God to perform the impossible! Isn’t that amazing?!

Oh, dear, precious sister, who longs to be married but feels like melting under the heated pressure of well meaning and not so well-meaning passers by, please remember WHO you serve! Remember that He has a plan for you! Know what you will say before the situation arises. Do not feel you have to debate or convince someone of your convictions. I have found it to be extremely rare that they are “won over.” Just state your faith is in God. Smile, and walk away if you must. But, do not forget WHO is in control and WHO has the pen of your love story! And be reminded in your humble heart that your faith in God is accounted unto you as righteousness.

God’s holy, faultless Word tells us in Isaiah 49, verse 23 that, “THEY WHO WAIT FOR THE LORD WILL NOT BE ASHAMED.” I believe this means that though our patience on the Lord’s timing may seem foolish to those around us and even to ourselves at times, God has assured us that we will not be put to shame by waiting on Him. What a relief! His Word also tells us that those who WAIT upon the Lord shall renew their STRENGTH, they shall rise up on wings as eagles. I have often tried to imagine how it must feel as an eagle to soar so effortlessly among the clouds. The only word that I can think of to describe the experience is FREEDOM. When we wait upon the Lord, we find freedom as well as strength! The Apostle Paul urges us to be content in every circumstance. That cannot be done but by the power of God at work in our lives. In our natural, carnal state, we are simply not capable of having peace and serenity when things in our life seem so uncertain…but through CHRIST, we are able to have un-comprehendible peace, peace that our human brains are not able to understand. It is all Him. There are so many things God wants to teach us during our “waiting period” no matter what it is we may be waiting on Him for. I know that I have a whole lot of things yet to learn. I can only pray that I’ll remain open and teachable. He wants our time in the “waiting room” to be a joyful experience for us. He truly wants us to “enjoy the scenery” and not dwell on the destination only. When we really understand that His way and His timing is absolutely PERFECT, then we are able to solely, with no reserve, TRUST Him. And when we trust Him even when we cannot see (we walk by faith and not by sight.), that is when we are able to receive the true contentment that only Christ Jesus can offer us.

God has shown me four basic ways that I can embrace the gift of waiting and make the most of this lovely season in my life. I would like to share them with all the ladies who may be in a similar season in their lives.

FOUR WAYS TO EMBRACE THE GIFT OF WAITING:

1. Savor Every Moment.

More than likely, once the object of our waiting has been brought to pass, changes will take place and life as we know it will be different. Anytime there is a change, there will be privileges lost even if they are replaced with new ones. Take this time that God has given you and ENJOY it! Be well aware that you will not have these exact moments of your life back . . . ever again. This season will more than likely not last forever, so remember, no matter what you may be waiting on God for, the present days are only yours once. Do not take them lightly. Do not be in such a hurry that you miss out on all the present blessings God is showering you with. Rather, rest in the Lord and enjoy the very life He gives every day, being confident that He is not slack in keeping His promises.

2. Do Not Wait Idly.

Keep yourself busy for the Lord and your family. Ask Him to bring opportunities your way to minister and witness and bring glory to His name. Do things that will help prepare you for what you may be waiting on. Honor your father and mother and others in your life by doing something special for them often. Practice submission and self-dying by putting others’ needs before your own. Offer child care while mommies and daddies go on a much needed “date.” I have to say that I have been so blessed by doing this! I have learned so much and every time I walk into a godly home full of laughter and the pitter-patter of precious little feet, I take mental notes on tips that I’ll use with my own children some day. I leave feeling so rewarded by God. Refuse to look at your time of waiting like a “pity party,” but serve others and receive the joy that comes with obedience! Stay busy for the glory of the Lord. Nothing you do for Him will ever be in vain!

3. Be a Broken Vessel

Humble yourself in the sight of the Lord and He will lift you up. Share your heart’s deepest desires with Him and let your cry be known unto Him, uncensored. Pour yourself out in prayer and worship. Become a piece of soft, pliable clay in your Maker’s hands. Ask Him to reveal His beautiful Self to you in a way that you have not yet known. Be willing to allow your wishes to die, taking Christ as your All in All and ask Him to reassure you that He is more than enough for you. He will. I have noticed countless times that when people sincerely offer up their needs and wants to the Lord as a sacrifice, confessing, “Not my will, but Thine be done.”, that is usually when He truly moves in our lives. He desires to have our utterly surrendered heart. We must seek His pleasure, not our own.

4. See the “Waiting Period” As a Chance to Work Double – Time for The Lord.

I feel that singleness is a wonderful time to give all our strength to the Lord through missions. Remember that missions do not have to be across the world’s oceans. They can be across the street or even inside your home! This is such an ideal time to give your whole self to become a hard-working laborer in His plentiful vineyard of ripe souls.

Maybe you’re waiting on a healing to take place in your body, an adoption to go through, a loved one to come to Jesus, or God to fill your womb with life . . . or maybe, like me, you are waiting for a husband and have given up your “right” to pursue a spouse and placed it into the hands of the Master Match-Maker. I challenge you to walk with me by faith and watch God move in His perfect, beautiful time. This way, He gets all the glory . . . because He is orchestrating it all and all I do is listen, trust, and obey.

No matter what you may be waiting for, I pray that each dear lady who has read these words will be encouraged to embrace the “waiting period” in your life- and that you may see that truly, waiting is not meant to be a bad thing, but a gift.

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You can visit Candace’s website: www.watchingforthemorning.org. She publishes “Watching For The Morning” – a newsletter which I highly recommend. HW