Being or becoming a godly woman is a noble enterprise. It is a great privilege, for we are created and designed to be a “metaphor with skin on” – modeling the fruits of the Spirit. If our fathers have done their job of modeling Messiah’s tender interest and care, we women easily respond to the office of Father and Husband. This is our calling-responsiveness. Just as the “church” is responsive to her heavenly Bridegroom, we are called individually to model in our families the joyful acceptance of our place in the Body of Messiah.

Scripture teaches us that the path to blessing is the honoring of our parents. If we want things to go well with us, we can unlock the fountain of blessing by using the key found in the Torah (first five books of the Bible). This does not mean that our parents are the source of blessing. Our Heavenly Father is the source of all blessings. But He has put a condition upon us. “Honor your father and mother…that things may go well with you…” (Deut. 5:16) Who doesn’t want things to go well in our lives? I discovered that in those areas of my life where I honor my parents things did go well for me. But in the areas where I did not honor them, I did not receive the blessing I wished for. I did not do my part to obtain the blessing.

No parent is perfect. So their imperfections become a doorway for hurt and blame to enter in. The good news of Scripture is that every hurt is an opportunity to accept comfort from our Heavenly Father. If we accept His comfort instead of blaming the people around us, He turns the hurts into growth and beauty. If we are looking for God’s blessing, He does not allow us to excuse ourselves by saying our parents are unworthy of honor. He was the one who called us from the womb (Jer. 1:5). That means he chose our parent, our family tree with all the flaws and tangles. The Body of Messiah needs you-with all your quirks and snarls. He is going to untangle the knots and turn EVERYTHING in your life into a blessing if you are willing to let Him do it his way.

Some of us do have badly flawed parents. Perhaps they are not even believers. What then? I talk to many women whose fathers caused them a great deal of pain growing up. Are such cut off from God’s blessings? Thankfully, no. God’s blessing through our parents does not depend on them. It depends on God.

We do not need to pretend that our parents are perfect in order to honor them. It is the truth that will set us free. And the most amazing truth is that God is able to bless us through the office of Father and the office of Mother-with or without the cooperation of our physical parents!

Paul tells us that “in everything give thanks, for this is the will of God.” The secret is out! If, when things go awry, we are willing to be grateful for the “pop-quiz” and thank God for what he is doing in our lives, we’ll be a straight A student-and we’ll discover that God delights to bless us.

“When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.” Ps 27:10