Shining Stars: Tell us a little bit about yourself (name, age, where you live, family, interests, etc)…
Paulina: My name is Paulina, I am 20 years old and the eldest of three daughters. I live with my beloved husband of six months in a cozy apartment in Austin, Texas. Almost exactly one month into our marriage, I found out I was pregnant. We are expecting our baby boy to be born in early to mid July! As a stay-at-home wife and soon to be mother, I enjoy the sweet simplicity of being a homemaker. My interests include reading, writing, cooking, baking, playing the piano and learning about how to be a better wife and mother.
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Shining Stars: What is your testimony (how did you become born-again)?
Paulina: I was fortunate enough to have been born and raised in a Bible believing family. My parents took my sisters and I to church every Sunday and we would regularly have family prayer time at home. Although we weren’t homeschooled, my parents enrolled us in a private Christian school during our elementary years, so I was exposed to the Scriptures all my life. However, it wasn’t until I was about 17 years that I started seriously studying the Bible and developing a closer relationship with the L-rd (whom my husband and I refer to as “Hashem,” meaning, the Name). It was then that I truly gave my life over to Him. My late teen years were among the most spiritually significant of my life. I felt Hashem’s presence with me daily and it continues to this day.
It was during that time that I came to a different understanding, Scripturally, than I was raised with. Through the help of a friend and then later, the work of the Holy Spirit, I came to understand the importance of the Torah (or Law) in the lives of those who believe in and follow the Messiah. Thus began a new and beautiful phase in my spiritual life, as my hunger for the Word increased and I sought to know Yeshua (Jesus) in a more Jewish context.
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Shining Stars: We understand that you considered yourself a stay at home daughter while you were unmarried – how did that come about? What led you to that decision?
Paulina: During my school years, due to the prevailing message our culture sends young women today, I never thought twice about my desire to have a career and several degrees to go with it. I wanted to be a doctor, much to the delight of my family. I even took classes in high school to help prepare me for that path. Of course, I also wanted to get married and have children at some point, but I imagined that would happen sometime after completing my career. In my mind, I never saw being a wife and mother as a career that one needed to prepare for. After all, what could be so hard about it?
Hashem soon opened my eyes to the truths found in His Word concerning women and their role. He used godly friends, as well as Vision Forum Ministries and Above Rubies to change my feministic mindset. I realized how selfish and independent I had become and repented of it. My desire to be a help-meet to my (then future) husband and a devoted mother to my children became a passion that I quickly embraced wholeheartedly. I abandoned my original plan to go to college and become a doctor and instead, sought to be as home-centered as possible. I say this because my parents did not embrace the concept of stay-at-home-daughterhood, but eventually consented to it as long as I took a few courses per week at our local community college. This arrangement allowed me to be home most of the day, since the two courses I would take at a time occurred in the morning. Looking back, I feel blessed to have been allowed the freedom to develop my homemaking skills while an unmarried woman at home, as well as the ability to grow closer to the Father during my quiet times (which were plenty!).
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Shining Stars: What are some ways that you were able to help and serve your family while you were unmarried?
Paulina: Being at home meant I was usually the one called upon to help with any ministry opportunity that came up. My parents have had a Bible fellowship group in their home for as long as I can remember. Every Friday evening, I took care of the children that would come so that their parents could enjoy the discussions taking place without interruption.
Because I was the only daughter in my family with a driver’s license, I was usually called upon to act as chauffer. Sometimes it was taking one of my sisters to school in the morning or dropping my other sister off at her workplace. I have always enjoyed cooking and baking, so my mom would frequently request that I make a dessert for their Bible fellowship or cook dinner once a week. Spending most of my time at home allowed me to grow especially close to my youngest sister, who is now in middle school.
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Shining Stars: How did you meet your husband? Can you tell us some of the events that led up to your marriage?
Paulina: I love this question! I always smile when I think back to our courtship story, which took place almost two years ago. My husband and I met on Facebook in the most unlikely of ways. He and I shared a mutual interest in the Torah as followers of Yeshua, which meant we had a few friends in common. One such friend happened to be a Bible teacher. She published a note in which she wrote some commentary on a certain Bible passage. I commented, and then my husband commented right below me. Agreeing with his comment, I posted a simple, “Amen!” The rest, as they say, is history!
He sent me a message introducing himself in a very respectful manner. After a few messages had been exchanged between us, in which we talked about our interest in the Jewishness of the Bible, I decided to let him know I did not feel comfortable conversing privately with him, explaining that I wanted to keep my heart pure for my future husband. I had determined early on in my life that I would not date, and instead wait on Hashem’s perfect timing for Him to send me my husband. He replied immediately, stating that he respected my desire and would not send me messages anymore.
Soon after, I removed my account and began a new one without telling him. However, I continued to keep him in my thoughts, and the desire to hear from him again became stronger every day. Eventually, he found me and sent me a message expressing his relief. Then, he asked if we could begin writing letters for the purpose of getting to know each other better. It was then that I asked for my parents’ blessing and permission. They agreed.
To make a long story short, we exchanged a few letters, and continued to e-mail. During that time, we were falling in love, and my parents could see that. Permission to begin talking on the phone was granted, and then three months later he came to visit me in my parents’ home for the first time. We were married about five months later. Our first kiss occurred after the wedding ceremony.
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Shining Stars: Are there any resources that have encouraged you in your daily life?
Paulina: There are many! I am an avid reader, so I have quite a few books that served of immense encouragement to me. Before You Meet Prince Charming in the first one that comes to mind. Also, Authentic Beauty and When God Writes Your Love Story, both by Leslie Ludy, So Much More by the Botkin sisters, Passionate Housewives Desperate for God, the courtship series by Mr. and Mrs. Castleberry, and Fascinating Womanhood (an excellent book and a must read for both married and non-married women). I have also been greatly encouraged by the DVD, The Return of the Daughters, and another one called, To Be One (it follows three young couples who chose to go the courtship and betrothal route).
Blogs such as Domestic Felicity and Home Living, which extol the place of a woman being in the home, whether married or unmarried were of immense support and inspiration to me. Lastly, I would like to say that Nancy Campbell’s Above Rubies magazine and ministry has been a major source of influence and encouragement in my life.
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Shining Stars: Do you have a ministry? If so, please share about it.
Paulina: I have always believed that a married woman’s ministry is her husband and children. That is what I consider to be my ministry. Although our baby is yet to be born, I feel that part of ministering to our children is in preparing for their coming. And as a young wife and homemaker, I strive to make my husband’s life as pleasant as possible. This means pouring all of my time and energy into keeping our home clean and orderly, making sure to stay within our budget by spending our money wisely on the things we need, and providing the comfort and tranquility my husband seeks after a long and hard day at work. I always think of the verse in 1 Corinthians that states, “… she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.” How true that is!
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Shining Stars: Do you have a home business? If so, please share about it.
Paulina: At this time, I do not have a home business. In the future, however, that may change!
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Shining Stars: What encouragement/advice/exhortation do you have to share?
Paulina: The most important piece of advice I could give to young women who have a desire to be married one day is to pray consistently for your future husband. You never know just how much he’ll need those prayers, even before you meet him! I prayed daily for my husband’s purity as well as for his protection, and this was years before the L-rd sent him to me. I know my prayers worked because of the things my husband tells me. I strongly believe in the power of prayer. If your heart’s desire is to one day have a husband and children of your own, let the L-rd know about it. Pour out your heart to Him, and do this daily. Hashem is faithful to those who love Him!
Also, being a daughter at home can be extremely hard, as such a concept is not accepted in our society today. But stay strong, and know that there are other young women out there who choose to live counter culturally, by aligning their views with what the Word tells us. By being a stay-at-home daughter, you are preparing yourself for the highest calling a woman can have – that of a wife and mother. Retain your purity, and strengthen yourself daily by reading the Word and speaking to G-d. Surround yourself with encouragement and like-minded friends.
